how are you?

i don't understand the question and i won't respond to it

For me, one of the most important, if not the most important, elements in a story is character. Plot has its uses sure fine, but those are secondary to a well-written, attention grabbing, compelling character who is interesting no matter what events happen around them. I’m looking for someone with a strong voice and sense of humor who possesses a rich inner life. Someone who is complicated, weird, assertive, self-deprecating and beguiling. I don’t want nice. I want a mean streak and a rebel, someone who is going through some shit and are completely themselves, barely holding it together. Every so often I find one of these gorgeous fuck-ups so well written that even I love to watch them stumble their way through the messes of life. I want abundant, too much protagonists, none of these “my main character trait is clumsiness”¹ shit. Honestly, I’m always looking for Fleabag² levels of personality and since she left us at that bus stop³ I’m always looking for similar characters who are stupid and clever, difficult and sweet, wise and floundering. ⁴

Today we’ll meet Eleanor, Margo and Maggie who are distinctively idiosyncratic. Flawed and funny, they flow from extreme to extreme and are able to hold multiple contrary opinions within themselves as they figure out this thing called life. I am charmed by their naivete⁵ and find myself more empathetic to myself and others after watching them tackle plot points with wit and moxie. Like me, you may find yourself feeling like a voyeur as you leer at their mess and demand more and more because you find them so intriguing. I think we can all see ourselves in ways small and large represented within these cluttered human beings and I sometimes miss them when I finish the book. Of course, these books have plots, events occur and conflict ensues but their primary draw for me is the main character’s way of thinking, being, saying and doing or not doing. They are having a real time of it and aren’t we readers lucky to be brought along on the ride?

Assemble your favorite snack, put on your favorite loungewear and get in the reading position of your choice (no matter how odd these may be) and crack open one of these.

Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman

Eleanor Oliphant is yanked from her extremely regimented, solitary life when the new IT guy and her rescue an elderly gentleman after he is injured outside of their office. After years of Wednesday phone chats with Mummy as her only meaningful interactions, Eleanor suddenly finds herself in a variety of situations which challenge her non-existent social skills as her literal, frank conversational style and inability to read non-verbal cues means she is strange and off putting to most people. As she slowly becomes part of a community, she must confront a dark, secretive past if she is to ever break out of the lonely “just fine” existence she’s been subsisting in and claim her place in a world that just might care for her in return.

Told in the first person, we get a front and center seat to the inner workings of Eleanor’s singular worldview, social interpretations, judgmental observations and deadpan humor. Armed with a direct and peculiar vocabulary, she tends to make those around her baffled and uncomfortable, but it made me giddy to witness from the safety of the page. Her inability to grasp or deal with unspoken cues, emotional reactions and societal expectations provides terrific humor while also tapping the mind of readers; why is x done this way or why do we do y when this happens? Who makes these rules and why do we follow them? Often there is real trepidation as we can read the social situations better than she does, but her navigation of these events often elicit chuckles, if not outright guffaws, though they can often leave a bruise as well.

As her journey progresses we catch passing allusions of her mysterious, tragic past and as these clues fill in the puzzle that is Eleanor it becomes impossible not to root for her to find companionship and wholeness, curmudgeon though she may be. Her growing understanding of the world and herself is incredibly emotionally affecting and her unique brand of tenacity creates a beautiful, deeply character driven story that, despite its heaviness, is full of sweetness, hope and life. Your gut will be punched and your heart⁶ will ache.

“A philosophical question: if a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound? And if a woman who's wholly alone occasionally talks to a pot plant, is she certifiable? I think that it is perfectly normal to talk to oneself occasionally. It's not as though I'm expecting a reply. I'm fully aware that Polly is a houseplant.”

Margo’s Got Money Troubles by Rufi Thorpe

publishes on 6.11.21

Margo, the daughter of an ex pro-wrestler and a Hooters waitress, is nineteen and pregnant with her English professor’s baby. She gives birth and just as her financial situation is about to become catastrophically dire, her father moves in and agrees to help with childcare so she can work. Her work evolves into an increasingly successful OnlyFans account where she uses the dramatic storytelling techniques she’s learned from the wrestling world to build a lucrative, but controversial, career. Margo’s creativity, ambition and audacity put her at odds with a world that seeks to diminish, ridicule and patronize her and when those attitudes directly affect her family, she must decide what the right path forward is.

I adored this book, one of my favorite reads so far this year. I had no clue what to expect and it just walloped and enchanted me. Don’t you just love when that happens?⁷ It’s fucking hilarious and frank with moments of tragedy, suspense and heartache. I fell in love with Margo from the first page. Her voice, ingenuity and sass rendered a sweetly naive yet stubbornly resourceful, clever, compassionate and loving heroine that every reader will root for immediately. There’s some delightful format play here; POV shifts and short interludes pull the reader aside to increase the tension and tragi-comic nature of the story and I was tickled each time they appeared. It kept me actively engaged and consistently rewarded my attention.⁸ This story deals with many themes without easy answers, compelling readers to see the nuance in humanity and the context of their stories. It is quite sex positive and explores a few worlds that I had little clue about.

Incisive, funny and fast paced this is touching and utterly unique with an endearing cast of characters that each contain multitudes and are so vividly drawn that it somehow increased my empathy for the human race against my will. It is endlessly entertaining, emotional and may induce bewilderment, laughter, pulled heartstrings, tears, more laughter, curiosity, anger, frustration and then even more laughter. I hope many people pick it up this summer, you included. Yes, you. Oh! its got such a terrific ending line. Ugh, I loved this book.

It looks like a tv show is already (!?) in the works with A24⁹, which I’m thrilled about, but I don’t agree with the casting of Elle Fanning for Margo. She doesn’t have the vibe I envisioned, but she is a terrific actress so I could be wrong. Anything is possible I suppose. Nicole Kidman, though, will be supremely campy I bet, a terrific choice.

The thing about Bodhi’s dad that was so confusing was that of course I only slept with him because he had the power, of course it was the fact that he was my English professor, my favorite class.

And yet so much of what compelled me was the way he kept insisting that I had the power. Which one of us actually had it, though? I used to spend a lot of time thinking about this.

Really Good, Actually by Monica Heisey

Maggie has become a 29 year old divorcée after her marriage ends about 600 days after the wedding. She is doing incredible; becoming one with the couch, embracing every fad, fashion and wellness hack she comes across, making all sorts of new “friends”, avoiding her thesis and finding her inner goddess while getting over her ex and letting go of all the expectations she once had for her life. She has a roller coaster of a year post divorce and readers get to witness every messy, shameful, batshit, weird, confusing, endearing and relatable moment of her struggle to understand her marriage, her story and her self.

Maggie is a modern idiot who just cannot. get. it. together. She is an absolute train wreck of a character that will be divisive for readers. You may love her. You may hate her. Personally, I enjoyed her extra-ness, but was also often exasperated with her and always happy that she was fictional. Whenever I needed a break, I could close the cover over her incessant much-ness, though I couldn’t ever stay away for long. I needed to know what she’d get up to next, even if I didn’t want to be her friend in real life.¹⁰

While Maggie is frustrating and consistently makes everything about herself as she flails headlong into the exact wrong thing to do, she is also nuanced and real. I found myself relating to her more than once. I admired her wit, energy, creativity, and how much of her self-ness she brought to every interaction, endeavor and “cure”.¹¹ She is a sort of anti-heroine, sabotaging herself in her desperate attempts to replace the narrative she had built as it crumbles around her. Because she is such a piece of work, watching her character arc is validating, energizing and hopeful even if you are rolling your eyes as you try to reach inside the pages to shake her. Because she is contradictory and so pitifully earnest you may also want to hug her.¹² I’ve never had an ex¹³, so while I didn’t relate to her circumstances I did find myself relating to her rabbit hole wanderings and bewildered curiosity to find the next “thing” - convinced that each remedy with be the answer to everything. ¹⁴

The vignettes between chapters had me consistently snickering out loud: google search threads, email diatribes, one sided tinder conversations, reasons I cried ¹⁵ and more show off the authors comedic eccentricity and realistic grasp on our modern internet age. Wise and clever observations are hidden among the messes of life and I applaud the Maggies of the world for their hope, curiosity and openness. I think the book does go on a bit long (I would cut about 50 pages) which may contribute to some reviewers hatred of Maggie, but overall I enjoyed cheering her on as she quests for self-understanding and acceptance. Because, aren’t we all in that same boat?

However, the temptation in this moment to dust off the ol' ED -to become one of those heroines in novels whose bones begin to jut concerningly, frightening their friends and rendering them absolutely gorgeous with grief-was strong. "Her big eyes somehow more blue for the dark smudges beneath them, Maggie was too sad to eat, because too many people wanted to have sex with her," or whatever. I was not about to be the first woman alive to experience emotional devastation without the sudden, dramatic emergence of my collarbones.

But I had recovered too well in that area, was annoyingly committed to nourishing myself, and so my soft butt and I stayed fed.

Wow, all of these covers work for me. Rare.

Who are some of your favorite lovable messes? Read any of these? You know what to do:

1. looking at you bella

2. i rewatch both seasons every year and suggest you do the same

3. it is a truth universally acknowledged that fleabag has the most perfect ending of any tv show

4. some recent reads with fleabag vibes that don’t fit with today’s categorization are The Rachel Incident and Green Dot

5. which isn’t something that usually charms me in real life…

6. i once told my toddler nephew that i didn’t have a heart and he collapsed on the ground in tears. i laughed maniacally

7. it is quite rare, but has happened a few times this year! go 2024 releases!

8. books need to earn the privilege of my attention

9. a good sign

10. i don’t have the kind of patience or kindness that would require

11. but does being human need a cure?

12. if you are a hugger, which i am not. i’m a glare-er

13. knock on wood

14. which we all know is 42

15. i identified most with “Dogs, generally”. i don’t care for gob animals.